Grandparents and Litigation

As both an #Attorney and an #Insurance Professional, weird scenarios go through my head from time to time.  Here's one.

I have dealt with many #grandparents in my practice.  Most of them are great and beneficial to the lives of the grandchildren.  Some are not.  I've dealt with both sides of the issue.

I seem to be having more and more issues lately with emotionally #toxic #grandparents, especially in the realm of #Juvenile and #Family #Law.  This applies to both #custody and #visitation.

So, here's one of the thoughts bouncing around in my head: 

If a married couple is trying to protect their minor children from the influences of a toxic grandparent(s), they need the following:

  1. Mirroring #Wills nominating a safe person to raise the child/ren should they both pass away.  The nominated person needs to agree (not necessarily on paper) and be aware of the situation with the toxic grandparent(s).  This person is known as a #Guardian.

  2. A Durable Power of Attorney for Childcare, should they both be incapacitated.  This will also name the above referenced Guardian.  (Note: this seems to be a somewhat uncommon document.  If you have minor children and have done #Estate Planning, make sure you have one.)

  3. Life Insurance for BOTH parents.  This could be either with their work or an individual policy(s).  In this, each #policy should have the other spouse as the primary #beneficiary, but it makes a lot of sense to me to name the Guardian as the contingent beneficiary.  The Guardian is going to need a healthy "legal fund" to handle any legal battle posed by the toxic grandparents.  Also, it helps simply to compensate this person due to lost work, lost business opportunities, etc. (I can hear the objection now - No, any assets from your #Estate are not good for this situation, because they are IN YOUR ESTATE and will take time to be available.  The Guardian needs QUICK access to funds that will pass outside of your estate.  There's only one reliable source for that and it's Life Insurance.)

  4. The book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend.  This is a fantastic resource for dealing with this sort of troublesome relationship.

Thank you for taking this trip with me through my mental fusion of law and insurance. Good luck with the grandparents and let me know if I can help.


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